There is essentially only one way in which you can bring about self-transformation – that’s if you want to – but you will not think you need to if you are still taking your happiness from outside yourself, and still managing to tolerate the periods of unhappiness which result.
As soon as your happiness is dependent on anything outside, you make yourself a slave to a condition, substance or perhaps a person. A slave is not free. And happiness is impossible if you are not free.Perhaps this goes some way to explaining why our happiness fluctuates.
Real happiness does not go up and down. Real freedom means that your happiness comes from inside out. That will require detachment and renunciation, not least from the illusions and conditioning of society which would have you believe happiness can be acquired from outside in. Can you see it?